The X List

I think sometimes of making a list
of my frenemies and nemeses
The people who I didn't trust
Or I know turned on me
Or who I just didn't get along with
Even though I'd tried

Something more than just a growing apart
Or a mutual spacing that, if we were in the
Same place
Same time
We'd likely hit it off just fine

A list isntead of glorious relationship failures
Though by no means limited to romance

And I wonder if other people have similar lists
Do others have such colossal pools of burning fire
Blowouts
Blowups
Blankets of silence thrown on once close friendships?

Is this part of being human
Are we supposed to leave everything on good terms
What does it mean, really
That we don't get along with some people

Maybe it never really settles with me
Because of my Protestant indoctrination
To love everyone

In fact that doesn't seem limited to one faith
Seems lots of folks believe
That we're supposed to be kindhearted, generous, forgiving, gracious

So what of all those who are on the X list?
Are reparations meant to happen?

AC, BC, EP, FK, RN, TC, AL, RM, DM, RL, RB, TR

Maybe we aren't to make amends

Maybe


THIS


is where it ends.

Holding my breath

Please oh please
Please oh please
With sugar on top
Whoever You are
Please oh please
Make this thing happen
Please
I promise I'll never ask for anything again
I think
And if I do
It really won't be as much as
I'm asking for this
Fingers crossed
Holding my breath

Thank you

For your pudgy legs
How you hate it when I comb your hair
For always standing up in your chair
For tossing the things you don't like to eat onto the floor
How you bust a gut at your brother's antics
For beaming with joy when around other kids
For the pathetic yet hilarious way you say "yea..."
For the hugs you circle around my neck
For how you demand baa baa each night, over and over
For how you love to put your own boots on, usually on the wrong feet
And how you follow the cat around

Thank you for all the ways you are you
For all the ways you are so bright
And all the ways you light up my world

My little girl
My smart, strong, wise girl
My funny girl
My roll with flow girl
My jumping off the coffee table girl
My rolling down the slide girl
My girl with evermore words
And an ever widening picture of the world

I love you and thank you a million times over
For these two years with you